The reason I'm saying Happy Dads Day, as opposed to Happy Fathers Day will be explained shortly. For now, let's just see what one of the definitions of "father" is:
"A Male person whose sperm unites with an egg, resulting in the conception of a child". (thefreeditionary.com)
You don't need to be all that involved to be a father. After all, even a sperm donor could be called a father based on this definition of the word. Being a Dad, however, is a whole different story. A Dad is involved in his child's upbringing. He's the guy who alternates with the Mom to check up on a crying baby at 3am, or to change the messy diaper, or to take her to ballet, or to take him to little league practice, or to console her when a boy breaks her heart, or to teach him about treating a woman with respect. Being a Dad is exactly about that: being. It's about being there for your kid(s) when they need you, and even when they don't.
It's never an easy job, but it is one of the most rewarding jobs ever. We can all remember getting a little frustrated with our parents as kids, sometimes a lot frustrated, but in retrospect, I can certainly understand why they were being tough in some situations that at the time didn't make a whole lot of sense. It's important for us, as parents, to remember that we're not here only to be our child's friend, but to be their guide, counselors and "retaining wall" when they get a little carried away. Sometimes you even have to be a bit of a dictator in order to catch their attention. The "my way or the high way" approach isn't very popular nowadays, but on occasion, it can be necessary.
I've been researching and studying the psychology of personal development for some time now, and I am 100% certain that the input we receive as children will most always be linked to how we perform and view ourselves as adults. It is crucial that we instill in our kids a sense of acceptance, love and belonging in what can otherwise be a pretty harsh world. By showing our kids that we love them and are proud of them just for being themselves is the first and most important step in their development. There's a wonderful book by Dr. James Dobson that I recommend to everyone, called "Hide or Seek: How to Build Self-Esteem in Your Child". In that book, Dr. Dobson talks about what we, as a culture, admire and sometimes idolize in people (beauty and intelligence), and about what we can do to better equip our child for success in his or her path to adulthood.
The main point to take away from this post is that we are ALL special. The very fact that we were able to be conceived, despite the numerous obstacles the sperm faces when trying to reach the egg, is amazing. Add to this that we survived the stages of pregnancy, and then our birth, and then our upbringing, is proof that we are incredibly special beings, and it is OUR job as Dads and Moms to show this to our kids. We must love our kids unconditionally, and praise their accomplishments in a way that builds them up, not breaks them down by merely criticizing what they did wrong. They need to focus on what is possible, not on what isn't.
Happy Dads Day to all you Dads out there. You have an amazing job, so keep it up!!
fes
I completely agree with you on this. There are so many fathers and yes mothers out there that are nothing more than a biological entity. They give birth to a child or impregnate someone but have no right to either call themselves a parent or are not capable to be a parent. It’s sad but true.
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